Wednesday 25 November 2015

The Way of the Dragon XXX

A period on non-blogging, non-running, some writing, defined by family commitments, heatwaves, sport crisis, existential crisis, photography classes. I have been watching quite a lot of TV at night, but after the attacks in Paris last week, there isn't much to watch, apart from the hourly reminder that we're all gonna die because ISIS is going to kill us all. So, watching TV is not really that relaxing.


But a couple of nights ago, completely unexpectedly, I bumped into 'The Way of the Dragon', one of the most celebrated of Bruce Lee's movies. I am a big fan of Bruce Lee: I always dream of smashing the whole dojo by myself, as he does in Fists of Fury.

 
However, I am particularly attached to the Way of the Dragon, for it is set in Rome: seeing Bruce Lee kicking asses around familiar streets/buildings is pretty exciting. Also, if you have never seen the duel between Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris inside the Colosseum (featuring kittens!), you should be ashamed.




(Com'on, click here).

However, while I was watching it, it suddenly occurred to me that there are strong analogies between martial arts movies and porn movies. Now, I have NEVER watched porn, EVER. However, a friend of a friend of mine knows a guy who once watched it, and this guy said that porn movies are about

(a) people having lots of awesome sex, and

(b) people who, after having had sex, say a bunch of stupid and completely irrelevant things to each other, until they have sex again.

So, this friend says, when you watch porn movies, you basically want a lot of (a) and zero (b): you're not there for the talking!, he says.

That's interesting, for I felt the same about The Way of the Dragon. Why are all these terrible actors talking? What's all that chat? What's with the plot?? Just fight, for God's sake, and shut up!





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